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kathy's right. i always always try, until i die... i dread the day when everything would just all accumulate and hit me right smack on the face, making me realize that this would have to be the end of it. so please god, help me continue to see the beauty and love even in the itsibitsiest thing, no matter how insignificant it is. i need to make something out of it, to keep me going and stop thinking. and along this journey, i need to boost my self-esteem because right now, i really really feel low, unimportant.

PS. can we get back to studying real medicine? nagdedegenerate na neurons ko.

PPS. on the other hand, i have this big project for my daddy-o's 50th birthday BASH. haha, bash kasi my mom wants it bongga. i need some ideas! there's already loads of great food, a surprise AVP, a string band, a bartender who can mix cocktails, and giveaways. o di ba talo pa ng dad ko yung mga nagdedebut! i just need a really decent program and put them all together nicely. and i love the theme: GOLD. perfect! :)  

 
 
 
 
 
 

Fam Med rotation is really so benign, my subgroup was dismissed super kaduper early yesterday and by 11 AM we were done for the day! kaya feeling ko monday lang ngayon kasi parang weekend kahapon. i spent the day lazing around the mall, sleeping, on the internet, and cooking parmesan crusted sole fillets with my mom. :) kung may kasama lang sana ako i would've been to 168 already!

pero minsan, ayoko naman ng masyadong benign... even my phi related katoxican is not too toxic nowadays. benign times gives me too much time to think, and too much thinking just gives me too much trouble! i'm not 101% happy like i am most of the time. i need something new to perk me up, to make my life more exciting. it's been stuck to a routine this past few weeks. i really wanted to go on a trip somewhere, wherever, basta away from the city, just to do something spontaneous (and romantic haha!), think, feel and reconnect. money was really not a big problem but we decided on using it on the party instead. and since birthday naman ni ge last monday, then i'm giving him a gift that is really important for him, hence, the partaaaay!

Nung Monday pala we had dinner at this greek restaurant in greenbelt, Cyma (hi ada!). Buti na lang their food choices are compatible with my diet strategy (haha!). i ordered this bowl full of seafood with saffron broth and ge the mixed meat gyro (parang shawarma, only bigger and the bread was whole wheat). i loved it! delicious, not too carb-y,  and it's healthy! palpak nga lang yung service nila don sa greenbelt branch. there was no waiter who waited for us to be seated and you have to raise your hand like mga 30 seconds before they notice you. ge was supposed to get this lamb dish but after getting our orders, the waiter informed us na hindi na nahabol yung lamb, hindi pa daw malasa (since we came near closing time, i figured naubos na yung lamb nila and hindi pa namamarinade long enough yung natira). so we just ordered the gyro instead, so ok na. sana. but then bumalik yung waiter and told us na ok, nahabol pala yung lamb. so ok na ulit. sana. then my food came. tapos sabi ng waiter hindi na daw talaga pwede yung lamb! and we waited some more and ended up with the gyro. buti na lang masarap yung gyro or else we would've emitted nega sparks dun sa waiter!

we watched lust, caution after. it's a r-18 erotic chinese film, set during the 2nd world war. it's pretty long 2 hours and 40 minutes! but has a good exciting storyline. medyo na-shock nga lang ako dun sa sex scenes because it seemed as if ipinasok talaga nung guy (bwahaha). i like din kasi mga (erotic, haha!) culture-y art films so all in all i loved it! kahit mahaba.

i give monday night 10 stars! :) it's been too long since we last went out on a date.

it's already 7:30 AM i better get prepared for school. not school pala. today we will fix the files in the health service. kakaiba talaga Fam Med. golly gosh see i have all the time to change the font size!

see you on saturday! :) 

 
 
 
 
 
 

time check: 3:32 AM. Studying. Reading Harrison's. Still up because i slept from 9-1:30 heehee. :)

Sobraaaang tinatamad na ako sa IM. Believe me, it really is benign. Nakakataba! Because we don't do anything except sit in that aquarium of a room and eat junk food that we can buy from 1AO4 (OB Clinic). yun nga lang, you just have to read almost everything in Volume II. yikeys.

And so dahil nasstress ako sa IM (actually, mas stressed out pa ako sa kaiisip nang ibang bagay that is related to the number 27!!) i took a night off studying last night (and the other night.... and last weekend as well!). no wonder my brain feels like mush right now-- parang wala akong naaalala. hahaha.

but in all fairness, there's this big chance that we'd be SMILING BIG SMILES this friday. ;) ooops, sana wag mabati.

1 week to goooo!!!!!

on other things, youknowwhat, in some private hospital na lang kaya ako mag residency ng OB (if ever i really decide to be OB)? i talked to a sis kanina and she said na you'd realize things in OB after your rotation in internship. first year residents are like the lowest of the looooow people in PGH. i'll be vague but i think i've felt like that already at some point in my life but being in a situation like that in 1-2 years or even up til 4 years?! i tell you, PGH is not a happy place. there are so many reasons to simangot in PGH. i don't want to be like that. so yun. booo. BUT it is, a good training ground for your skills and clinical eye. anyway, so glad i still have like mga 3 years to think.

PS. i liked no reservations. :) it's cute, and not so mushy. pero nakakakilig. :) dapat makita nyo boyfriend ko pag kinikilig. bwahahahaha!!!

 
 
 
 
 
 

The exam was a big jowk! i'm so glad i stayed up the night before the exam not because of studying, but because i went to the victory party of the newest Phi MDs at blueroom. hehe. tapos pag uwi ko, mejo di pa ako antok so i read harry potter muna. :)

The next day, i was soooo sleepy because i was awake til 2 AM... our Pulmo OPD got cancelled because wala palang schedule ng pulmo that day. so by 9:40 AM was able to go home, supposedly to study seizures cause i haven't bothered to read up on it (skip skip skip sa Nelson). But noooo, the alpha waves conquered me and i was soon fast asleep. when i woke up, 12PM na, and i was even debating whether to go meet ge in PagK, or window shop. wala talaga sa isip mag aral! i ended up going to the exam room early kasi Ge had lunch with his "children" pala, and wala na pala akong pera. =)

Dapat 60 items ang exam but 50 lang pala. And i wouldv'e passed even if i didn't lift a single page of Nelson! It's easy, but not stupid easy. =) mapapaisip ka rin naman (once in a while, haha!)... sobrang recall lang of whatever you've understood the past 3 years and what we see everyday in the clinics. i guess that's 3 years' worth of stock (or stuck dahil sobrang paulit-ulit na? haha) knowledge, may alam ka din naman pala. ;)

the best thing: items 47-50 are BONUS for being eager to learn students, participative, and respectful. haha! ayos! 

OB, here i come! :)

 
 
 
 
 
 

leche naman kasi, kung bakit sa lahat ng times na pwedeng mangyari na mawala nang sabay ang 2 starbucks na malapit, na pwedeng lakarin, na kaya kong puntahan ALONE, eh ngayon pa kung kelan kami big four?!?!?!?!?

i hate having to depend on someone just so i can study.

and hate even more when that someone can't be there because of soooo many reasons. i should be used to it by now pero minsan, talagang may ouch pa rin. and i know it's not his fault but this happening for like a trillion times is really frustrating. as in shet ang galing ng timing. it's conspiring against me. kung kelan kailangan ng makakausap, ng makakasama, ng makakapagpasaya... hanggang asa na lang ako. better luck next time. ohwell. (but this doesn't happen naman palagi, buti na lang)

argh. must go out. really. nababaliw ako when i'm stuck with academic readings for more than 2 hours.

or siguro, masama lang talaga gising ko.

*poof* my happy pink balloon is deflated.

 
 
 
 
 
 

the exam is only 5 days away. we've been given an entire MONTH to study, but i really can't bring myself to sit down and stare at the humongous book in front of me for more than 2 hours. my brother put it nicely, "nakikita ko pa lang yang librong yan, tinatamad na ako!" humirit pa yung pinsan ko, "nakikita ko pa lang yang librong yan, tatalikod na agad ako!" bwahahahaha. and when i brought it home from med when i borowed it from alric, my arm hurt until the next day--from having to carry it from the stones to my unit. ilang kilo kaya itong librong ito? *weighs the book* 5 kilos! shet. 5 kilos of pure, unadulterated FUN. haaaay.

i actually already finished reading up on the must know topics but i do have this tendency to just browse and skip the boring ones... and there's always this voice in my head saying "masyadong detailed yan, di yan kailangan". hahaha. so skip skip skip. i wonder if i'm sentencing my own death. i usually just put everything in my head THE NIGHT BEFORE THE EXAM. sheesh. it does work though, but i don't know if i can get away with it during the big four rotations (IM, PEDIA, OB, SURG).

topics i love: 1- renal failure 2- liver failure  3- heart failure (haha puro failure, how morbid)

topics i hate: seizures, brain tumors, acute respiratory infections (lahat sila same level of hate, meaning skip skip skip)

and stupid me, i bought myself a distraction. was finally able to find HP book 5!!! right now i'm debating whether to pick up my trans, or resume reading the book. ;)

PS: i just finished reading stardust by neil gaiman. loved it. can't wait for the movie. :)

 
 
 
 
 
 

may san fo treats na sa rob ermitaaaaaaaa!!!!! it's just a dainty pink stall in front of oxygen. heehee. seems my wish was granted. syempre, i had caramel apple for dessert nung lunch. yuuumm talaga. the juicyness of the apple coated with chewy creamy caramel and chocolate and sprinkles. all flavors bursting in your mouth as you bite into it. yuuuuummm!

 
 
 
 
 
 
my closest friends in med school, my best friends for life, the ninangs of my future children... :D my batchmates in Phi. :)

of course, the term BIATCHMATES could only come from one person! kathy and her craziness. :) hahaha!

i'm reposting Ivy's ODE TO HER BIATCHMATES (that's us!) cause she was really able to put into words what i feel towards those girls.

We may be few in number. We may come from different classes. And, we used to lead very different lives. But, two years ago, we all made one choice and never looked back.

The lasting memories I've formed with these ladies have been of learning to bloom despite adversity and of achieving more than we could ever expect from ourselves.

They say it is best to keep friends who bring out the best in you. These ladies have done nothing but just that.

+++

To Joan, Miya, Twinks, Gera, Jakes, Siena, Kathy, Mel, Ces, Nikki, Ivy: You're the bestest exprience med school has to offer. :) i'm proud you're my sisses, even prouder to be your biatchmate!

How bout we go out this friday. game? i hope we're all free!!!! kahit whenever, basta complete tayo!

PS: i realized lang. all of us have multiply accounts! di ba? although twinks' and ces' mukhang di na-uupdate. :o

 

 
 
 
 
 
 

thank you to everyone who attended and took time out to get to know our sorority... :)congratulations to the phisisyans for making the event a tremendous success!!! nakaka-phi high talaga. :D the video made by Eliza Dejoras (Phi 2006, Class 2010) will be uploaded soon as we figure out how to convert it. ;)

Words by my very own batchmate Kathy Reyes (Phi 2005, Class 2010) :)

Behind every photo,

Stories, of laughter, and tears...

Behind every dream

A longing, for something more...

Behind every initiation,

A discovery,of great potential...

Behind every gift...

Time, wholeheartedly shared...

Behind every song,

A soul, crying her heart out...

Behind every dance,

Steps, we take together...

Behind every triumph...

Minds, put together...

Behind every mission

Dreams, we make true..

Behind every doctor...

Journeys, beyond her walls...

Behind every sis,

Commitment... forever and unconditional...

Behind every gathering

A celebration...of a lasting tradition...


Can you see behind ordinary things?


Look beyond... Look within...


No boundaries. No obstacles. Nothing ordinary.


Each moment well spent.


Phi Lambda Delta


There's more than meets the eye.

 
 
 
 
 
 

my hair is getting longer already, i can tie it up without half of my hair (my so-called bangs) obscuring my vision. now: get a haircut or do i let it grow? if i get a haircut it will be untie-able again... but i'll look younger. :) if i let it grow, my ponytailed hair will better suit the hustle and bustle of the OPD and ER where toying with my hair is not exactly a good idea. but then again, i can wear head bands.

sheesh. i don't even have money for a haircut pala. that's really exaggerated but you know me, i just spent on shoes na naman. then felt guilty after buying those purple flats. then felt the high again when i tried them on when i got home. and now i feel guilty again coz i remembered!!! tsktsktsk. but they're nice though. and reasonably priced. hmmm hmmm hmmm. :)

+++

yesterday was spent eating a lot of food and walking from one mall to another. from trinoma to the block to SM north and then all the way back to trinoma cause that's where were parked. my first time ever to set foot on those three malls. yep, even SM north!! :) haha, halata bang probinsyana ako? alabang naman kasi has everything. and kung wala pa don, makati is just 30 mins away.

i like serendra more. but not when i'm shopping for clothes. haha! serendra for those nights where we just want to eat (try abe, it's yummy and realtively cheaper than the other restos!) and when i'm craving for sweets (nothing beats sonja's cupcakes!!!). AND fully booked is heaven! 4 or 5 glorious floors filled with shelves and shelves of books and gorgeous jordi labanda notebooks! hehe. :D :D :D

trinoma... the architecture inside confuses me. sobrang daming twists and turns and ohmygulay you wouldn't want to be stuck in their parking lots during an earthquake! very very very low ceiling as in muntik ng madali yung thing sa taas ng starex. as in "gabuhok" as the guard described it.

don't know why but i was more tired of walking around trinoma than MOA. wasn't even in the mood to watch a movie then, i just wanted to go home. but that was before we saw schu, topshop and krumpler! haha! and ang funny pa, ge wanted so much to go home he covered my eyes dahil nauna nyang nakita yung schu. syempre i dragged him pa rin to the store. ;) but i didn't buy anything. see? i have self control din naman pala, once in a while. haha!

other stuff we/i did:

1. ate caramelized apples from san fo treats and fell so in love with it. :) i even tried to make one of those caramelized apples just now... but failed! shet. the caramel was okay but i guess i chose the wrong topping. marshmallows. they slide off the apples. better if candy sprinkles or crushed oreos na lang. too bad walang sprinkles dito sa rob supermarket.

2. ate napoleones and a giant silvanas ball

3. ate at brother's burger

4. bought the first installment of my bday gifts-- books!! better read now while it's mejo benign. i bought about a boy by nick hornby, the house of spirits by isabelle allende, stardust by neil gaiman. :) no HP 5 anywhere on this side of the earth ano ba yan! even ge's copy is missing.

5. went domestic and bought a plunger from handyman. haha after gamitin ni ge toilet ko, nagbara. bakit kaya... kidding!!! i flushed the remainder of last dessert's sago down the toilet kasi. bad idea. but now it's okay na! i'm so proud of myself and my plunger!!

6. basically went inside very store we fancied. and that included me sulking in computer shops as ge spent so much time just looking around.

7. ate (again for the nth time) dinner in ge's house

4/7 activities were eating. anubayan??!!!!!

+++

oy, i finished 3 topics in nelson just now. fever and typhoid fever and dengue fever = 9 pages LANG! hehe. but that's really the most that i've read recently in an acads related book. :p

sleepy sleepy. sick child clinic na naman kami bukas.